and on that note, here we go...
Today began with the question, "Why?" How about that for one's first conscious thought? Encouraging. A great preview to the day. And somehow I managed to get up, talk to God for a while, then head to the gym.
Yet after a 10am meeting, I knew something had to give. The lady I met with is my fundraising coach and I probably said far too much to her, too much about nothing worthwhile. Body language. Snippets of "woe is me." I'm sure she sensed it; she's a mother. That reality woke up a tad bit of embarrassment. How did I let my tongue get so careless? It also woke up to the knowledge that no matter how I felt, I still needed to get stuff done AND the way I felt needed to change.So I raised my desk chair, turned it to face my laptop and miraculously began some self-talk.get over yourself.
it's not about you. it never has been. it never will be. you're name isn't "God." and the truth isn't meant to be comfy. now get to steppin.
I posted it on FB, as if to dare myself to own it but also to garner some "like"s as moral support. And the steppin began, movement overcame "why?" And at minutes to 3pm, I'm thankful to have accomplished all that I've accomplished in the hours behind me.
Sometimes affirmation isn't about warm fuzzies, pats on the back, and the undivided attention of a friend. Sometimes affirmation is simply the assertion that something exists or is true. Today I had to affirm that I was too focused on me. I had to affirm that my stress levels were due to an unhealthy and unholy assumption that I should be able to "git er done" all by myself right now. And even though I would have denied that at 5:45am with a very definitive response about delegating and timelines, had I truly believed that it wasn't all about me, I wouldn't have asked, "Why?" I would have been content in the midst of multiple projects and a strong desire to become a better me. I would have been content.
I posted it on FB, as if to dare myself to own it but also to garner some "like"s as moral support. And the steppin began, movement overcame "why?" And at minutes to 3pm, I'm thankful to have accomplished all that I've accomplished in the hours behind me.
Sometimes affirmation isn't about warm fuzzies, pats on the back, and the undivided attention of a friend. Sometimes affirmation is simply the assertion that something exists or is true. Today I had to affirm that I was too focused on me. I had to affirm that my stress levels were due to an unhealthy and unholy assumption that I should be able to "git er done" all by myself right now. And even though I would have denied that at 5:45am with a very definitive response about delegating and timelines, had I truly believed that it wasn't all about me, I wouldn't have asked, "Why?" I would have been content in the midst of multiple projects and a strong desire to become a better me. I would have been content.
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